Going through a divorce can be one of themost challenging experiences of your life. It’s a time filled with emotional upheaval, legal complexities, and profound personal changes. As a Certified Divorce Coach, I’ve seen firsthand how transformative it can be to have the right guidance during this pivotal period.
Embracing the Moment: Finding Strength in Divorce Transition
Divorce is hard, and Katie made the experience bearable. Her knowledge of the process and resources available to me helped tremendously. On top of it all, she recommended the perfect lawyer. I am so thankful I had her knowledge, as well as her encouragement, through the whole process. Thank you so much, Katie! ~ Wendy V. Why Slowing Down After Divorce Matters
The Risks of Moving On Too Quickly After Divorce
I am so, so thankful for a friend’s referral to Katie! I felt I had a pretty good grasp on the divorce process but did not trust my ex enough to not throw some curveballs. I hired Katie to be another set of eyes and ears, to reassure me that I was not overlooking anything. She ended up exceeding this expectation! She gently nudged and kept me on task. She suggested other options to consider when I was uncertain. She provided recommendations for great, local resources. She listened through my tears, my frustrations, and my worries! She was so easy to work with and to talk to! She has been a true blessing and calm through the end of my (marriage) storm! ~Buffi O. Ways to Rebuild Yourself After Divorce
My Personal Divorce Journey
How a Divorce Coach Can Help
The Importance of Divorce Coach Training
My Divorce Coach Training
Hire a Certified Divorce Coach
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A trial separation can be a constructive step for couples seeking clarity about their relationship. However, without a clear plan, it can easily become a source of confusion and conflict. That’s why having a detailed checklist is so important. This guide will help you create a structure that ensures your trial separation is productive and respectful for both partners.
Why You Need a Trial Separation ChecklistA trial separation checklist serves as a roadmap for your time apart. It covers everything from setting goals to managing day-to-day logistics. Whether you’re contemplating reconciliation or preparing for divorce, this checklist can help you stay organized and reduce unnecessary stress. Trial Separation Checklist1. Define the Purpose of the Separation
2. Set a Timeline
Determine how long the separation will last. Common timelines range from three to six months, but it’s essential to choose a duration that works for both partners. Agree to revisit the arrangement periodically to evaluate progress.
I had such a wonderful experience, Katie was very helpful and kind through the whole process. I would definitely recommend using her for your divorce needs. She was excellent at guiding me through the toughest moments! - Kerry C. 3. Draft a Written Agreement
4. Decide on Living Arrangements
Determine who will stay in the marital home and who will move out. If finances allow, consider renting a separate space. Ensure the arrangement is practical and supports your goals for the separation
Simply put…. Katie is amazing! I chose to work with Katie 8 months into my divorce journey when the process had come to a complete standstill. I was not getting anywhere with my attorney . She gave me intelligent, thoughtful advice and the tools I needed to expedite the divorce. It took less than 6 weeks of working with Katie for my divorce to be finalized. I couldn’t have asked for better support! Not only did Katie give me the right guidance, she was very caring and checked in and followed up with me ALL along the journey. - Kendra B. 5. Establish Financial Guidelines
6. Create a Parenting Plan
Katie was so wonderful! During what started out as a very stressful time in my life she helped me stay grounded and focused on the end result which was what was best for me and my family. She offered good advice and made herself available to talk and reassure me! 7. Set Communication Boundaries
8. Address Emotional Needs
9. Plan for Personal Growth
10. Schedule Regular Check-Ins11. Consider Legal Advice
Even if you’re not planning to divorce, consulting a legal professional can help you understand your rights and responsibilities. This is particularly important if financial or custody issues are involved. This is also important if you feel like your spouse is trying to scare you out of a divorce. Check out my guide below if that resonates with you!
12. Have an Exit Strategy
Define what happens at the end of the trial separation. Will you reconcile, extend the separation, or move toward divorce? Having an exit strategy ensures that both partners are on the same page. Working with a marriage counselor can help define these goals and expectations together.
Additional Tips for a Successful Trial SeparationHow a Divorce Coach Can Help
How a Divorce Coach Can Help with a Trial Separation
Navigating the decision to divorce is never easy. Whether you're in a high-profile marriage, dealing with a high-conflict divorce, or feeling stuck in a relationship plagued by "roommate syndrome," open and honest communication can provide clarity. As a divorce coach, I've guided many clients through these pivotal moments, helping them determine whether to move forward or seek solutions to repair their relationship. Below, I’ve outlined ten key questions to ask your spouse before filing for divorce. These range from logistical to deeply emotional and can help you make a more informed decision about the future of your marriage.
Setting Expectations for the Conversation
Also, remember that their wants don't always equal what they will get. Just because they WANT the kids 75% of the time doesn't meant they'll get it. Or just because they WANT to keep their entire Roth IRA that they contributed to while you stayed home with the kids so they could build their career, doesn't mean they'll get to. If their answers seem extreme, unfair or threatening, schedule a consult with me and together we'll get your divorce on the right path.
Emotion Based Questions for Divorce1. Do You Feel That Our Marriage Is Meeting Your Needs?
2. Are You Willing to Work on Our Marriage?
If you’re contemplating divorce but are open to reconciliation, this question is crucial. It gauges your spouse’s willingness to attend counseling or seek other forms of relationship support. If they’re unwilling, this insight might help solidify your decision to move forward.
3. What Do You Think Has Changed Between Us Over Time?
Understanding how your spouse perceives the evolution of your relationship can shed light on areas of disconnection. This conversation starter often uncovers moments of misunderstanding or neglect that could be addressed if both parties are willing.
4. Do You See Us Growing Old Together?5. What Does “Happiness” Look Like for You in This Marriage?
By asking this question, you’ll gain insight into your spouse’s values, priorities, and expectations. If your visions of happiness don’t align, it could be a sign that the relationship’s foundation is fractured.
Logistical Questions6. How Would You Envision Co-Parenting if We Divorced?
7. Are You Open to a Collaborative or Amicable Divorce?
High-conflict divorces can be emotionally draining and financially devastating. By asking this question, you’ll better understand your spouse’s willingness to work toward a fair resolution without unnecessary hostility.
8. What Are Your Financial Concerns If We Divorce?9. What Do You Think Is Fair When It Comes to Dividing Our Assets?
This question helps you understand your spouse’s perspective on fairness in the division of marital property. Knowing their stance early on can influence your approach to negotiation or mediation.
10. How Would You Feel About Working with a Divorce Coach?A divorce coach can provide invaluable support in navigating the emotional and logistical complexities of divorce. Introducing this concept to your spouse may help them understand that professional guidance can lead to a more constructive and less adversarial process. Why Asking These Questions Matters
The Role of a Certified Divorce Coach
My Thoughts as a Certified Divorce Coach
Divorce is a life-changing decision that should never be made lightly. By engaging in open and honest conversations with your spouse, you can gain valuable insights into the state of your relationship and make a more informed choice. If you’re struggling to navigate this challenging time, or you want to divorce in the best way possible I’m here to help you move toward a brighter, more empowered future.
A trial separation can be an emotionally charged step, but for many couples, it’s an opportunity to gain clarity about the future of their relationship. Whether you’re considering this path to reassess your marriage or prepare for the next chapter of your life after Divorce, it’s important to approach a Trial Separation with thoughtfulness, intention and preparation. Here are the top 10 things to think about when starting a trial separation to ensure the process is productive and respectful. 1. Define Your Goals For Your Trial Separation
Before initiating a trial separation, both partners should agree on its purpose. Are you using this time to work on your marriage, or are you leaning toward divorce? Clarifying your intentions can help avoid misunderstandings and hurt feelings.
One Client's Story: Megan and Tom decided on a trial separation after 15 years of marriage. Megan hoped the time apart would allow them to rediscover their individual identities, while Tom wanted to evaluate whether their relationship could still work. During the separation, Megan enrolled in a painting class, reigniting a passion she had long ignored, while Tom focused on therapy to address personal challenges. These individual pursuits gave them new perspectives and helped them communicate more openly when they met for their scheduled check-ins. By outlining their goals and committing to personal growth, they created a foundation for productive discussions that ultimately clarified the future of their relationship. 2. Set Clear Boundaries With Your Spouse
Boundaries are vital during a trial separation. Will you date other people? Can you have sex during your Trial Separation? With each other or other people? How often will you communicate? Will you share finances? Establishing these rules upfront reduces confusion and potential conflict.
3. Communicate with Children
4. Create a Trial Separation Agreement
A written agreement can outline logistics like living arrangements, financial responsibilities, and parenting schedules. This document serves as a reference point and helps manage expectations.
5. Consider Living Arrangements
6. Develop a Financial Plan
Money often becomes a sticking point during separations. Discuss how you’ll handle joint accounts, bills, and other financial obligations. Transparency is key to avoiding conflict.
7. Seek Support
Navigating a trial separation can be overwhelming. A divorce coach, especially one experienced in high-conflict situations, can provide guidance tailored to your needs. Search for terms like “divorce coach near me” or “best divorce coach” to find the right professional.
8. Take Time for Self-Reflection
9. Create a Trial Separation Checklist
Having a checklist can keep you organized and focused. Here’s an example:
10. Schedule Regular Check-Ins
Periodic check-ins allow you to evaluate how the trial separation is going. Are you achieving your goals? Is there progress in communication or understanding? These conversations can guide your next steps.
Why Work with a Certified Divorce Coach During a Trial Separation?
A divorce coach provides the support and perspective you need during this complex time. As a Certified Divorce Coach, I specialize in helping clients navigate trial separations with clarity and confidence. Whether you’re contemplating divorce or seeking to rebuild your marriage, I can guide you every step of the way.
To learn more about how I can help, schedule a Free Consultation. We'll take 30 minutes to talk about your unique situation and determine the next best steps.
Why Is It Called Divorce Day?
Divorce Day has earned its title due to the noticeable spike in inquiries from people seeking divorce-related services after the holidays. The reasons behind this trend vary:
Waiting for the New Year: One Client’s Story
“I thought waiting until the holidays were over would make things simpler,” she told me. “But then life kept throwing curveballs—work stress, unexpected legal complications, and trying to explain everything to the kids. It was like there was never a good time to do this.”
That’s when Emily leaned into the support of divorce coaching. Together, we created a roadmap for her divorce journey, breaking it into manageable steps and addressing each hurdle as it came. Whether it was preparing for mediation, navigating co-parenting conversations, or finding moments of self-care, Emily learned that having a trusted guide made all the difference. There’s Never a Perfect Time to Divorce—But You Can Be PreparedThat’s where a divorce coach comes in.
And because I work with clients nationwide, I’m here to support you no matter where you’re located. Whether you’re in Peoria, Illinois, or across the country, you deserve guidance that empowers you to move forward with confidence.
Why Choose a Divorce Coach?
Unlike attorneys or therapists, a divorce coach is focused on helping you navigate the logistical and emotional complexities of divorce. Think of it as having a trail guide on a challenging hike—someone who knows the terrain, anticipates obstacles, and keeps you moving forward.
Here are a few ways I’ve helped clients in Central Illinois and beyond:
Your Fresh Start After Divorce Awaits
If you’re considering divorce this January, know that you’re not alone. Divorce Day may mark the beginning of your journey, but it doesn’t have to be a journey you take by yourself. Whether you’re facing a high-conflict divorce, navigating the complexities of a high-profile separation, or just trying to figure out the next step, I’m here to help.
Let’s make 2025 the year you move forward with clarity, courage, and support. Schedule a consultation today, and let’s navigate this journey together.
Divorce can feel like navigating an uncharted wilderness—overwhelming, emotional, and full of unforeseen obstacles. But it doesn’t have to be that way. With the right tools and guidance, you can move through your divorce with clarity, confidence, and yes, dignity. That’s why I created Trail Guide to Navigating Your Divorce, a comprehensive course designed to be your trusted companion through this challenging journey. Here’s what you need to know about the course, what it includes, and how it can help you reclaim your peace of mind while paving the way for a brighter future.
What Is the Trail Guide to Navigating Your Divorce Course?
For only $299, you get immediate, full access to the course. Each module includes a dedicated YouTube video and a Google Doc to help you put the lessons into action. You’ll also have the option to add a "One Hour to Clarity" call with me at a discounted rate of $79, giving you personalized guidance at a fraction of my standard coaching fee.
Even better? If you decide you want even more help from me after completing the course, the $299 course fee will be credited toward your 1:1 coaching package. Divorce Planning Made Simple: What You’ll Learn in Each Module
Here’s a glimpse at what the course covers:
Module 1: Choose the Right Path for Your Divorce
Module 2: Build Your Dream Divorce Support Team
Module 3: Parenting Through Divorce with Grace
Module 4: Financial Confidence During Divorce
Module 5: Stay Focused and Keep Moving Forward
Why My Trail Guide to Navigating Your Divorce Stands Out
The Trail Guide to Navigating Your Divorce isn’t just about surviving divorce; it’s about thriving through it. Here’s what sets it apart:
Who Should Enroll in This Divorce Coaching Course?
Take the First Step Toward Divorcing with Dignity
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