I recently got back from an amazing trip with my dear friend Rei. We went to Northern Napa area of California. We hiked, enjoyed plenty of wine and ate enough cheese and bread to feed a small country. I had a terribly hectic time trying to get home amidst wild storms in Texas which cancelled loads of connecting flights. Somehow I managed to get a 3.5 hour Uber from Fresno to San Francisco which I think was only possible because of lots of wishes and prayers. Although rationally I knew I was safe and my family back in Central Illinois were safe, I experienced some crazy separation anxiety. I needed to GET. HOME. NOW.
Now that I'm home and summer can officially start it feels good to fall into our slower rhythms of life. The kids sleep in a bit more, I have a little bit longer to linger over my coffee in the morning and I enjoy almost daily garden walks. One Win to Share
I successfully helped another client have a VERY fast divorce. If everyone is amicable and in agreement and mature, we can get through the entire process in only six weeks and less than $3000 in legal fees. I am very proud of how I help my clients understand the divorce process so they don't get swept up into paying un-necessary legal fees or having their emotions triggered by so called 'bulldog' attorneys. If you want a quick divorce, please get in touch with me. I'll help you avoid all of the common pitfalls of the divorce process so you and your spouse can move on with your lives with finances intact and being able to coparent if needed.
What I'm doing when I'm not working
Planting trees. Watering trees. Checking on trees. Recently I planted over 200 White Pine, Norway Spruce and Bald Cypress on our land. I manually dug for each bare root tree and have been hand watering once a week unless we get enough rain, which really hasn't been enough. I'm seeing growth though and it's so exciting! It's a lot of work but I love checking on them and seeing them put out new buds!
What I'm Reading
To say I enjoy a range of types of books would an understatement at best and what I'm currently reading is the perfect example! I just finished Finding the Mother Tree by Dr Suzanne Simard which is a science-y but beautifully written book about trees and how we can best support them while also managing forests and humans' need for wood for products. Did I cry a bit on the plane as she wove it all together with motherhood? Maybe!
Then, on the MUCH lighter side is The Marriage Sabbatical by Lian Dolan. Yes, exactly what it sounds like. I'm only about 2/3 of the way through but it's a cute, light read about a couple who decides to take a sabbatical from their marriage for a year. Honestly, as a divorce coach, I wish more people would do this before jumping to divorce! Quote I Love
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about the things that matter." Dr Martin Luther King
There is SO much to unpack with this one but for now, I'll connect it to marriage and divorce. How often do people give up in marriage? Not in the sense that they give up and just get divorced because honestly, that's usually a flippant thing people say that have never experienced divorce. No, I'm talking about giving up trying but also becoming complacent with a terrible marriage. Cohabitating. Living as roommates. Only talking to discuss who's driving the kids somewhere. Sleeping in separate rooms. Are you still LIVING like this???? This is not living, my friends. This is not only a terrible example of a marriage for kids but this is YOUR ONE LIFE. This is it. Is this how you want to spend it? Or maybe a better question is this a marriage you would want for your children?? No?? I had someone tell me recently that they just don't see an easy path to divorce. They're right. But they're also wildly miserable in their marriage. Yes, the path will be uncomfortable and have challenges but, especially in this person's situation, they are not insurmountable. From personal experience, going from a sad, lonely marriage through divorce to the other side was SO worth all of the challenges along the way. This is why I decided to become a divorce coach: to help my clients understand the divorce process. Need more proof? Here's a pictures from our 16th anniversary we celebrated two weeks ago. I would have never had this if I made myself silent about my first marriage. Client Review
"What a lifeline!! Katie helped me through the intense rollercoaster of one of the most complicated divorce processes ever. She has an incredible gift of staying relational and calm AND is able to be focused and factual. This is a rare find in a human! Her ability to help me stay focused on next steps despite the chaotic events of the divorce kept me grounded. She helped me fill out complicated court paperwork one step at a time. She helped me talk through and formulate my questions before I called my lawyer so I could be articulate and precise. Before I secured Katie’s services, I remember wondering if I could afford a divorce coach. The truth is, I couldn’t afford to go through my divorce alone without Katie. Highly recommended."
That's it for today! I hope your summer is off to a great start! If you think this might be the time to consider starting the divorce process, check out my calendar and pick a time that works for you! Don't see anything that works? Send a message to me and we'll figure it out!
XO Katie
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About Katie VAndenBergKatie makes her life in Central Illinois surrounded by river valleys and prairie. Her days are spent helping her divorce clients, working with her tenants, tending to her gardens, spending time on her pottery wheel and loving her family. Archives
December 2024
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